my entry yesterday was made in a fit of sadness. i cried last night after The Governor was tucked in his bed, and then i woke up this morning and just sort of went on with the rest of my life, and that's just what i'm doing right now...because i have that luxury.
my shipment from Fire Mountain Gems came in this morning while The Governor and i were at the mall, and i haven't yet experimented with my spoils. my newest obsession is amazonite because of its beautiful, natural aqua blue color. although it's a light pastel, i think that this is going to be a very popular stone this fall. and if not, that's okay because it means more spoils for me! i'm finding that it goes beautifully with that orangey caramel shade sometimes found in carnelian.
don't you think that waiting is hard? you have a pre-set expectation that something is going to happen, and that interstital time when it doesn't happen is a time where you can't do anything to alter the consequences, for the most part. so you have to wait. and think. and go through endless variations on the outcome. i'm currently waiting right now to hear on a potential j0b offer, and i have no idea when it will manifest itself...or if it will at all. i have to mentally prepare myself for not getting it because up to this point, i'd operated under the assumption that i was a perfect fit, as that was what almost everyone was telling me. however, there is the possibility that they have found an even more perfect fit, and i hadn't really had time to consider that. i know it sounds a bit pompous of me, but i'd been so busy with the multiple interviews and references and getting everything together.
but this "waiting" stage has brought out for me that possibility in my conscience and now i'd begun to realize that it is a possibility. and inside, i think i would be fine in the long run, but in the short term would be disappointed and would just need some time and support.
Posted by equilibrium-girl at September 4, 2004 03:38 PM