equilibrium-girl.com

Oh hai

Oh hai-have I told you how much I *heart* America's Best Dance Crew?. I Ti'faux the episodes on Thursday nights, and The Gov. and I watch either Friday night or Saturday afternoon, critiquing each performance.

Molly thinks Jabbawockeez will win. She says they are always precise, but she is a little freaked out by the masks.

What about the time we all sat around the Christmas tree and beatboxed?

NSFW (what are you doing at work anyway?) or kids (put 'em to bed early under the pretense of "Santa coming early").

Kicking Up Leaves

Whew. The allium are in the ground, all 25 bulbs. We'll see if they break up the ornamental grass monotony in our front yard come May next year. I really should be trimming back some of the greenery in our front yard, but for some reason I just keep on planting and planting more. Maybe I'm in landscaping denial. We've got some weird ground cover issues that I simply don't have the energy to deal with.

Yesterday was a rainy Saturday. I secretly love rainy Saturdays. I don't feel compelled to do much except muck around the house, nagging my husband. I shouldn't say that-there is more than enough to do these days, between work and home, etc. I celebrate Halloween for basically the entire month of October. Why wait until the end of the month to decorate and drink cider? You could knit yourself a candy corn hat while you're at it.

And now, it's random picture time:

Height Requirements

Baby, We Should Just Do This

My online friend Hollai has taken up knitting. She has already knit a super-cute baby hat. A part of me is proud, and the other part is secretly jealous. Actually, jealous-in-advance.

Now I'm no knitting slacker and have busted a move on a couple of pieces, but this girl is creative to the millionth degree and I see her knitting something whimsical and wonderful within a couple of month's time. I wouldn't put it past her to knit a Nimbus 2000 (she would find a way to knit one you can ride without having it felt too much in the area where you sit).

In the meantime, The Gov. has taken to watching MTB4 with me. I'm a sucker for MTV reality shows, but this one is like Laffy Taffy on my back molar--if it's on, it sits there and there ain't nothing that can be done except savor. We rooted for Big Mike and Donnie. I watched the finale but His Honor has not seen it yet. I hope he'll be pleased. :)

Keep One Eye Open

I want very much for people to know that I'm still using this blog, so I'm posting a picture of my child-turned-cyclops.

Ain't the cutest cyclops you ever did see?

Hey Hey You You I Want To Be Your Girlfriend

We love OX so much, but my sister is the lucky one as The Gov. has designated our green fuzzy friend her boyfriend.

Family Crush Roundup

Crush roundup:

Conan's crush: Alison Kelly from PR. Described as "smokin' hot." We all love her.

The Governor's crush: the girls in Danity Kane. He was completely entranced with the "Show Stopper" video, and when we listen to the CD, he wants to know if we're listening to the song where "they're standing in the street." I caught his head nodding in the rear view mirror on that track.

My crush: None other than Justin. Just because.

5 things I feel like right now

1. That last bit of mayo in the jar that you just can't seem to get.
2. That liquidy stuff at the top of the ketchup that's settled in the bottle that you either have to shake and mix in or pour off
3. The baked-on Pam on that extra muffin tin space that never got filled before you put the muffins in the oven to bake
4. That lone earring sans mate that sits on the side of your jewelry box. You know, the one that you consider turning into a charm on a necklace (but never get around to).
5. That fuzzy crud in the roof of your mouth when you first wake up in the morning.

Summertime/Just Sit Back and Unwind

I love the summertime ice cream treats just as much as anyone else, even though I'm a mature, professional woman with a great family and lots of adult-type responsibilities.

I still can't help giggling like a perv_y little schoolgirl when I eat a chocolate covered banana.

What Up, Dogg?

I think on Monday, the salutation on my emails to clients will incorporate "-dogg" for example:

Hey B-Dogg:
Please see the attached redlined document for my changes/suggestions. Exhibit K needs to be updated to incorporate my suggestions provided during our call last week, yo.

As always, let me know if you have any questions, and I'll drop some knowledge.
J-town

Double D-O-G

Last night before bed, His Honor and I read Daisy's Babies in honor of Rufus, the "Best in Show" winner of the Westminster Dog Show. I was truly surprised at work today that so many people had either watched the show or knew the Rufus had won. Me personally, I prefer the Komondor-you know, the one they featured on Animal Planet's commercials for the AKC/Eukanuba National Championship? That dog looks like a mop on legs, and I just think it's so great.

Dial It Down a Notch

The last couple of weeks have turned me into a stress-filled basket case...of sorts. I'm sitting her on a Saturday morning obsession over some random adminstrative paperwork (that can be fixed and can honestly wait until Monday) and the fact that I left (I think) The Governor's birth certificate in my office (I needed to bring it to his school for re-enrollment). In my head, I'm cross-examining myself, and the line of questioning is completely unyielding: "Is it really still in the office, or did you end up recycling it?" "Why didn't you just leave it in the car so that it would be at home this weekend?" "Are you or are you not going into the office to pick it up?"

If it wasn't snowing, I'd plan on a quick jaunt to the office to take care of both of those things, but with that and Conan sleeping in, it may not be worth the risk. It's probably not, and two weeks ago, it woudn't have bothered me. However, yesterday at 5 p.m., I was sitting on the phone, listening to my boss berate clients who frankly messed up and are trying to cover their tracks. So I'm hell-bent on relaxing this weekend, but my brain has been set on high and is continuing to work overtime, even though it doesn't have to. I wish I could take it out of my skull and find the setting dial and dial it down a notch.

The One in Which She's Still Recuperating...

It's definitely "do something nice for yourself" time for me. This past week was one of the most stressful since I started my current job a year ago. We are not only a "man" down in my shop as one of my colleagues is now on maternity leave, but I ended up picking up management of a rush project. It's pretty confusing at work right now, and I'm still in the process of mentally unwinding from it.

I probably shouldn't be posting Conan's skivvies on the internet for the world to see, but it occurred to me that both he and The Governor have practically the same pair:

The One In Which She Talks About The Weather

Other things pounding the W&OD trail besides my running shoe-clad feet this morning: small bits of hail. It was so strange-it was windy but mild initially and semi-sunny, but halfway through my run the temperature dropped and the occasional drops of rain turned hard. There wasn't a ton of it, but I contemplated the strangeness of it as I completed my run.

I needed a stressbreaker after yesterday. I have a team of clients that consistently escalate to my boss and my boss' boss. We were cohesive in our response, but now I'm starting to doubt the decision to just let someone else up the chain respond. I wasn't thinking and I was so slammed with work that I didn't think through the potential impacts. I trust there will many escalations in the future-and many times to prove myself.

This week was otherwise exhausting as well-The Gov was sick on Sunday and Monday, then Conan caught whatever he had. Of course, mommies hardly ever get sick. It's either that, or our bodies suppress full-fledged symptoms. So we walk around feeling ill and exhausted-but still well enough to tend to everyone else!

I'm working on a crocheted wire and bead bracelet-I can't wait until it's completed, but it's really working my hands. I know now why I'd been taking a break from jewelry-making: I wanted to save my hands. They get so sore when working with large gauge wire. I'm definitely more of a paper crafts and jewelry (with a little bit of sewing) type of crafty gal, but at the very least it's nice to learn some basic crochet stitches.

The One She Where She Pieces Together Random Thoughts

If you journal, I would suggest picking up The Decorated Page by Gwen Diehn. I have a couple of other books about embellishing and decorating journals, but this is the first one that makes keeping a visual journal approachable. Based on my collection of beautiful-but blank books, I'm intimidated by the prospect of keeping a journal. A lot of books out there mostly discuss advanced techniques and feature examples of feature-rich journals, so even reading them I'm left not knowing where to start. However, this book breaks it down in to palatable categories and steps. From explaining matching up an appropriate blank journal, to how to go about some simple techniques for decorating it, to listing out some supplies that are helpful to have around, I'd say it's a pretty great book.

Other news-three days ago, I woke up a brunette. Of course, I went to sleep the night before a brunette as well-but that was after a 2-hour stint at the hair salon that evening for my first-ever professional hair coloring. I don't necessarily feel any different-and it's not a terribly drastic change, but I like it. I'm considering adding a couple of auburn highlights to it, just for fun. This is more high maintenance than I usually go, but after seeing my sis and her auburn bob with fringe bangs, I was sorta jealous. Mine is more chocolate brown than anything, so it's not too noticable.

My creative spurt is coming back. This morning, I woke up thinking about crocheting wire. And my most recent G00gle terms are "peruvian opal briolettes" and "pink tourmaline beads." Not the most cost effective beading supplies, but super pretty. We do like the pretty around these parts.

The Gov. told me over holiday break that he didn't want to be on Pr0ject Runw@y because he "didn't want people to see his belly button." Apparently, when he watches it with me, he really notices the model changes. So he will not be double-cheek kissing He1di Klum anytime soon (she looks great preggers, by the way).

"Besides," he added thoughfully, "I don't have a dress."

The One She Writes So There is Actually An Entry Here

I'm sad that tomorrow my sister is returning back to The Lou. I've enjoyed having her here this week, and not just because she had washed my dishes and watched over His Honor, but because she's fun to be around. Also, being the extremely fit person that she is, she's motivated me to exercise-I haven't gained any weight during the holidays (so far), and I feel like I have a little more energy than usual.

I've cooked and baked quite a bit this past week, as my kitchen has become a more comfortable place to me as of late. But for some reason, dirty dishes keep on manifesting themselves in my sink. I've called Ork1n to see what the problem is, but they can't seem to figure out where these pesky things have been coming from.

The One in Which She's a Total Spazz

I've been doing a lot of window-shopping lately. Men are more interesting when both they and you are older. You find certain things-personality, ambition, kindness-infinitely more attractive than physical appearance, and it can hit you pretty hard. I shouldn't be questioning people's motives in extending specific kindness, but I can't help it. I just wonder if I'm getting into that "mutual attraction" thing again. It was thrilling and wonderful and complicated and difficult at the same time, and I'm not sure that I have the energy for that again. I'm not assuming that it does happen to be mutual-it could be nothing of the sort. But establishing it in my mind as one-sided doesn't do much in terms of internal resolution.

However, this time the answers are fairly cut and dried. There are circumstances and consequences and factors that heavily weight towards the singular course of action of doing and saying nothing. It is not a bad thing to have these feelings, I tell myself. They are perfectly fine, and frankly, it's sort of fun.

The One in Which She's Giddy

Two o'clock this afternoon found me extremely giddy, bouncing around my office and grinning from ear-to-ear. Clients came by, bearing gifts and tidings of joy. I'm not ashamed to say that I was pretty happy about the gifts. I'm currently in possession of a limited quantity object that kicks major ass. What's more, it was procured specifically for me and then presented to me by a cute boy. Yay! I like my job.

Yesterday, Conan returned home from an errand to the walls of our quaint, split level home reverberating to pounding bass. The Governor and I were jumping around and shaking our asses to the tune of "Whoop (There It Is)." Conan's to blame for it all, having hooked up our stereo in our living room. My finding his old dance CDs from the mid-90's didn't contribute to it at all. That's probably the best part of motherhood-being elated at just the smallest things-which inevitably turn out the be the biggest things of all.

Doctor, Doctor

Normally, I wouldn't care who they have lined up for the upcoming season of The Bachelor. But for some reason tonight while I was browsing TWOP, I wondered the the show's link was up near the top in the "Competitive Reality" show section, and they were reporting on the newly-selected chasee.

Who happens to be someone with whom I went to college...only 10 years older and a doctor, but minus the flannel shirt and backwards fraternity hat.

L.A. Face With the Oakland Booty

Hey strizz, thanks for this.

Nothin’ I do is new to you

I think my dog tried to chew on my cell phone, but gave up. I can't see how it would be particularly tasty. Besides, it's a weird, thin-brick shape that doesn't easily nestle itself between canine chops. I imagine it tastes like hard, molded plastic and not beef or chicken or pig ears. But hey, it plays "Dr0p It Like It's Hot" whenever someone tries to call me-so maybe he's drawn to the Snoop Double D-O-G as a kindred spirit.

Three Thangs

Since everyone else is doing it...why the f&$k not?

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Putotikoy (family pet name)
2. Mommy
3. SB

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. My half-moon shaped eyes
2. My hair (someone described it as "fetish hair")
3. My 5-inch multi-colored dragon tattoo on the small of my back

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. My post-partum "apron"-still there after 4 years
2. My stress-induced undereye dark circles
3. Saddlebags

THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. Visayan
2. Spanish-although this is actually a secret
3. ???

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. Creepy horror flicks
2. Someone realizing that I'm just a 12 year old living a 32 year old's life
3. Losing Conan

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. Fountain pens
2. Kisses from The Governor and Conan
3. Coffee (word, breana)

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. Yoga pants from Tar-jay
2. Ye Olde Navy baseball shirt
3. A grin

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS:
1. The Rain King-Counting Crows
2. It Takes Two-Rob Base & DJ E-Z Rock
3. Bonita Applebum-Tribe Called Quest

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1. To laugh every day
2. Hugs when I'm asleep
3. To feel like I'm twelve years old every day

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:
1. I was a cheerleader in college and cheered at two Final Four games
2. I've taken a vitamin every day this week
3. I have deposed high-level executives in Fortune 100 companies

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE PREFERRED SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. A hot, to-die-for grin
2. Pretty eyes that you get lost in
3. Cute little butt (that you just want to give a nice pat...)

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. Sleep
2. Kiss my sleeping child
3. Make a beautiful necklace (currently lacking inspiration)

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING/YOU'VE CONSIDERED:
1. Rock Climber
2. Martial arts stuntwoman
3. Communications/PR lackey

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Indonesia
2. South of France
3. Japan

THREE KID'S NAMES YOU LIKE:
1. Connor
2. Sam (for a girl)
3. Quincy

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. Get to a VP position
2. Give my son a good, balanced upbringing
3. Let my husband know how much I love him and how much he means to me

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
1. I love purses and shoes
2. I giggle and flirt uncontrollably
3. I have crushes all the damn time

THREE CELEB CRUSHES:
1. Jensen Ackles (Dean Winchester in Supernatural)
2. Anderson Cooper
3. Sebastian Loeb (World Rally Championship winner)

Ok get ya kids/but then they got their friends

A couple of nights ago, my dream pool floated to the surface the subject matter of this entry, and it involved details of his life that were beyond our sphere of interaction. The details in that dream were completely arbitrary, but I woke up not only feeling rested and whole, but as I stepped into the shower and the filmy coat of sleep washed off of me and down the drain, it dawned on me that the dream was about perspective: I've learned from past experiences that while crushes are very nice, they need to be viewed against the backdrop of real life. Even if an attraction is mutual (I'm not saying it is, I do not really think about it that much, and aside from just plain musing I'm unsure as to how much it matters), it does not necessarily give you a license to act.

I saw him today twice-the most I've seen him in the last couple of weeks-the first time was one of those interactions after which you shut the door and blush and promise yourself that you will not act like a complete dork.

The second time, however, allowed me to see him as a person and not an object. We discussed some aspects of our respective lives. I started to mentally list out all of his innately human tendencies. And then...we were friends. All of a sudden we had just reached this point where the conversation became easier. I laughed with ease, and not this forced, nervous cackle that plagues me when I'm nervous. I joked. And finally, I smiled. It was the type of smile that reaches as far as your ears and uses the muscles in the back of your head: a true, genuine smile that I could actually feel in my bones. Like the type of smile that crosses my face when I read breana's posts.

This is good.

Supa dupa

Ok, so Supernatural.

I really like the show. The two main leads (Jensen Ackles = teh hotness that reduces me to schoolgirl tummyflies), the plot line, basically everything.

Almost everything.

Well, except the fact that I get the heebie jeebies so easily. I don't like horror flicks, I don't like ghouls. Ghosts are interesting, but sort of unsettling to me. So a show that features supernatural plot lines that are based in actual legend or folklore makes me go to bed feeling a little unsettled. Not really looking forward to the whole nailed-to-the-ceiling flashbacks, but I'll just hide my eyes whenever that stuff shows up.

The show site is cool. Too bad I can't get past the secret trunk compartment.

Special Message from The Department of Mental Security

Important Safety Notice: The Inappropriate Crush Object Warning Level has been lowered from Red (Cheeks) to Orange (Highlighter Fiddling While Speaking). I spoke with him today for a while, and after my initial semi-hyperventilation eased and my heart dropped itself willingly from my throat, we had a very nice, friendly conversation. It helps when the buzz due to the blood rushing to your cheeks eases so that you can actually hear what the other person is saying . I was even enough at ease so that I could execute my speech-and-debate rooted pen twirling technique over the course of our conversation as close to flawlessly as I could. It still makes me kinda nervous to speak with him, but I'm kinda over it.

I believe we should be entering the nice, safe "eye candy" zone. You are free to move about the office with ease.

Reminisce with Me

I've never admitted this to anyone, but I love document production. It's not necessarily the actual review of the documents themselves and the analysis of evidence that I enjoy so much-it's the actual process of marshalling the documents along their merry way and all that that entails. From the receipt of the request to the grilling of clients to see what they know to the identification of "relevant" documents, I can't say that I've felt as accomplished as I did when I led an orderly parade of burnt CDs full of email inboxes into the hands of a government investigatory attorney. But frankly, I consider document production to be somewhat of an art form--categorization of documents according to subpoena specification is largely a judgement call save for some clear cut cases. I love keeping Excel spreadsheets with neatly identified columns labeled "status" and "Bates Range." I can't tell you why. Perhaps it was they nifty color-coded keys, or perhaps the tangible work product of stacks and stacks of bankers boxes filled to the brim with paper or CDs. I'll really never know, but to this day, neatly organized privilege logs spark a certain nostalgia in my soul.

Ack

To say things are stressful in our house right now is an understatement. Today, not only do my in-laws come into town, but we are bringing home a doberman-beagle mix named Hobie. We are adopting Hobie from the local beagle rescue organization, and I'm looking forward to having a dog in the house. However, we have a ton of shopping to do in the meantime. Regarding the in-laws, I'm going to try and stay positive and be grateful that they are here to help us out, particularly since I need some extra time to get work done these days.

Red cheeks

I'm embarassed for myself. I have this weird and totally inappropriate crush, and it's so silly that I feel odd just writing about it. Pure, run-of-the-mill kindness impresses me, which is really sort of pathetic. But I have the urge to gush, and so that's what I'm doing here. Really, though, these things get put into perspective after a while, and it passes but remains a pleasant factor. All I have to say for now is the following: some people can be so darn cute it's criminal.

There and Back Again

Being on vacation with my family (my mom and dad, my brother and his family, and my sister-plus Conan and His Honor) is not really much of a vacation. It's stressful watching after 3 kids, particularly if: a.) one of them wakes up in the middle of the night, screaming "I need something! I need something!," and b.) one of them (His Honor) is sick, and c.) there is no air conditioning in the vacation house.

So, we're back at home a day early in order to get some quiet, rest, and recuperation. Then day after tomorrow, it's back to work and yet another type of madness.

I'm in the middle of watching Secretary. Why has no one told me that: a.) Maggie Gyllenhal is gorgeous, and b.) this movie is so wonderfully scripted? Why why why was I not informed of these salient facts?

Thinking, thinking, thinking...

I just thought of a great way to work in a Brad Pitt reference into a training module. However, I don't know if I'll get to hold this particular type of training, and it makes me a bit sad.

In addition, I am slightly peeved that in The Life Aquatic the script refers to the language being spoken by the pirate-type Asian-looking guys as "Filipino." There really isn't any language called "Filipino"-- several dialects are spoken in the country itself. The most prominent dialect is Tagalog. However, Tagalog isn't prominent in the areas where insurgents base their operations.

I really should get out more often.

Afflictions of the Single Woman's Brain

My sister (who I'll call "Dish")suffers from a type of condition called Boyfriend Amnesia, in which her brain selectively filters out 99.97% of the ways in which her current boyfriend has been either a.) to ignorant to notice, or b.) proactively been a jerk. The curious thing, however, is that Boyfriend Amnesia disappears completely at the time of one's wedding, and is replaced by Husband Hyperfocus, where a woman picks up on every committed infraction and assesses it a higher importance than necessary.

Like most serial monogamists, Dish remains absolutely committed to making this work out because I think she is a true believer in the whole of "meant to be" paradigm. Under this worldview, you have an absolute duty to sally forth in the dating world, discerning which potential beau was "meant to be" your mate for life-or at least for a very, very long time. If things don't work out with a potential fellow, you cry for exactly 4.62 days while your best friends describe in exact details all of the reasons he wasn't right for you. They finish up their helpful, soothing diatribes, draw up their collective breath, and utter the phrase of finality: "It'll work out for you, because this one, sweetheart--it just wasn't meant to be." Then they'll add "You're worth more" or "You can do better" for good measure.

But in the meantime, until either one or both of you mutters "I'm sorry..it just isn't working out," you have an obligation to, as Tim Gunn from Project Runway says, "Make it work." So you tell yourself that his forgetting to call every now and then is "just him being busy" or you say "he's only been acting this way lately," and you forget all of those times that you called your sister or friend that year and cried about his brushing you off with no explanation. In this fashion, Boyfriend Amnesia takes over your brain, like some sort of water-oil mixture that lets all the gunk settle to the bottom settling in comfortably until the point of break-up when all gets agitated and mixed up and gives you the right thing, sort of like the tang in the vinagrette dressing.

In the past, the only person that's been able to shake Dish out of this state is Conan. He did it in the parking lot of Kr0ger's while we were doing pre-Thanksgiving errands three days ago. I forget exactly what he said, but she broke up with the poor bloke who was her boyfriend at the time at the end of that week. It was long overdue. I'm ineffective at it, for some reason. I've tried all of the usual lines. I've even suggested that she should "rethink" things. But I've never said "I think you should break up with him," because that translates to me hating the guy. In that case, it's not so much the truth as much as the appearance that carries the day.

The particular boy in question came over to visit her when I was talking to Dish yesterday, so we couldn't continue the conversation at hand, the one that was a typical exhibit of Boyfriend Amnesia. Yes, I know she has to see it for herself, but I think because this current version is remarkably better than the previous one gives her a certain amount of myopia when she looks at him. He's not that bad of a guy...he's just not that great either. But hey, it's really not my life or choices, now is it?

Funnai

I am working on an entry of substance, but for now enjoy this great commercial that Conan sent me (QuickTime required).

"Hi, Just Wanted to Say..."

The Remote Boss was recently accorded the title of Official Rock Star (to paraphrase). I attempted to write him an congratulatory email, but I just couldn't think of anything to say. I just sat there at my computer with a blank email form in front of me, blushing.

Any suggestions?

Mumbo Jumbo

How can something as simplistic and mundane as a really, really, big LED screen have the privilege of having the wonderful distinction of being called the Jumbotron? I've been hammering through various contracts and other materials, and that thing has been mentioned more times than I can imagine. I'd always conjured up this fabulous mental image of a huge, globe-shaped, rotating display when I come across the word "Jumbotron." Or maybe something even cooler, like a big, elephant-shaped, walking contraption the size of a Tiffany's store, with maybe displays in the place of eyes. But noooo--it's a two-dimensional, flat screen. And what fun is that?

Bachelorette in Alaska Finds Love

CN-N's account of octopi birth is terribly clever. They don't know how long the precious tiny hatchlings will last, but kudos to Aurora.

Little Update from the Field

On top of everything else, I am having some sort of separation anxiety about The Governor and Conan going up to Chicago this weekend. Per my previous entry, I am feeling panicky about His Honor being on a plane without me twice. It doesn't matter that he is going to be with my capable husband, or that it is a direct flight both ways, I just feel so nervous about it.

I am also in a quandry about what to do with my jewelry. I jointly participated in an in-home jewelry sale that I received 2 weeks notice about, and without going into it, it was discouraging. I feel that the best way to get my things sold is to do it online, but if I did that, I want to do it properly, with my own URL and a pretty site and a tax ID and everything. But to do that either takes time or money, and I'm feeling not that committed to the idea just yet. I was so discouraged that I stopped making things last week (but only to start making a bracelet for myself last night). Not quite sure what to do (but I have a couple of neat pieces that I am unwilling to unload for a very modest price, if anyone's interested drop me a comment).

On my list of things to do is an entry for greschya. But for now, here's sending you some wonderful gestation vibes!!

Silly, So Silly

Patently Silly just doesn't get updated as frequently as I like, but that's okay. I don't think the world is quite ready for a prostate massager or even an exercise treadmill for dogs.

Things are okay with me. Work is crazy, but so much fun. Last year around this time, I didn't know that I would have the type of job that entails so many shift-on-the-fly decisions. My boss says I'll get used to this--I hope so.

He also remarked yesterday that some of my jewelry "looks like candy." Which is odd, because that's exactly what i'm trying to convey. That's my aesthetic. Instead of reaching of a piece of rock candy or a stick swirled in cotton candy, reach for a pretty, sparkling set of delicious earrings or a chunky bracelet. I guess I get as much from the feel of gemstone nuggets against my wrist as I do eating a J0lly Rancher. In fact, I bought some dyed red candy jade that looks like cut-up pieces of licorice at a bead show last weekend. I've been playing with my spoils from that show. If you have started making jewelry, bead shows have the best prices, particularly on silver findings.

Public Service Announcement

I need a personal disclaimer that follows me around and states the following:

Subject to occasional bouts of self-doubt and over-sensitivity, which may impact effectiveness and efficiency of work product and other matters. Side effects stem from prior work experiences, middle child birth order, and lack of sleep. Consult a second opinion in the event that reactions appear illogical or lack any semblance of common sense.

What would yours say? Does it differ from day to day?

twas chilly and the warmth beckons...

fear ye the wrath of the fuzzy wool sweater; it beckons from yonder closet with sweet promises of warmth as your cold bare shoulders shiver in the morning chills. seduce me not, oh ivory sheath of knitted beguilement, for as the day grows dark and the shadows lengthen, ghostlike wisps from your being jettison in the air around me. you cast your web of wonder white on the black of my office chair. you shall not call me from your cavelike surrounds, aside the BCBG slides of summers yore and the bootcut jeans of many Saturday moons! tempt me not to glide your lofty threads against me, leaving me to wrest fuzzballs from my cuffs. oh sweater! only packing tape or a defuzzing comb shall tame you.

One of "Those"

i re-opened my comments, so please leave me a note. it's lonely in my little corner of the interweb.

i've become one of those people that walks around in T@rget with an earbud in her ear that's attached by a long wire to...you guessed it...something that has a keypad and fits in your pocket. yep, that's me. cliche. trite. haven't i always been, though?

Conan cancelled our landline. We figured between corporate discounts/free service, we save $150 per month if we did it. It's a little strange because I've always had a landline, but since I'm a company girl, I might as well do it. Why not?

Denial

Conan blithely denies that he wants a radio-controlled car. However, in our URL history are less than 5 links to RC websites. He also has told me the specific type of RC vehicle he wants. Denial is sometimes an exquisitely simple thing.

it's plain to see in hindsight

Remember how I talked about the Remote Boss in the entry on the top of my October Archives page?

Well, it turns out that I have a crush on him. All of that jabbering about how he is such a great boss and gave me a lot of independence and what not? Well, it turns out that I was attracted to him for all of those things. You know how I found out? I actually met him in person this morning. Fancy that. It turned out that we were at the same conference. I had promised him before I left my previous place of employment that I would say hello after he gave a presentation. I ended up sitting through his presentation with the vague thought of "hey, my former Remote Boss is kinda cute. actually, he's really cute."

and with that, i kept good on my promise to say hello after his presentation, and it turns out that he was every bit as nice in person. and cute.

did i mention yet that he was cute?

but the funny thing is, i know a lot of people would not find him objectively cute. i think because i knew a bit about his personality beforehand, it colored my opinion of him.

i get the vague feeling that i've written something like this before.

New Alignment

When did Ryan Reynolds get to be so ridiculously hot? I used to not be into facial hair (on a guy, silly people!), but he does it so well. It helps us get beyond the whole Van Wilder thing.

Oh, and the new muscles sorta help too. I used to be a Pete type a gal in my "2 Guys and a Girl" watching days, but it should be clear as to why I've seen the light and become a Berg devotee.

all out of sorts

i brought on the bitchy this weekend, boy did i. it was either fussing about the fact that Conan asks for directions after he turns the key in the ignition and starts driving (so that we have to back track 2 blocks to see the damn White House Christmas tree), or making him come back to the table after he uses the excuse of Tivoing Desperate Housewives to take his dinner downstairs just so that he can watch football. um, sorry, there are 2 hours before the show starts, you just sat down at the table and for all of the lecturing that you do to The Governor about not spilling/talking nicely at the table you better have a bulletproof excuse or you can sit your ass down and eat, mister.

i told Conan that i'm like the federal administrative process: give me adequate notice and opportunity for a hearing and everything should go smoothly. but alas, Conan never took administrative law. he is also a) male, and b) the youngest of three children, and c) male, so ex ante communication is not his forte. i'm going to have to consult Dr. J0hn Gray on this just to learn how to cope. i know it's hokey, but it's something to hold on to.

i've turned into the hoarder from hell lately, feeling guilty about every single Christmas-related financial outlay. the solution this year is to give handmade photo albums from kits to extended family member groupings, and we have about 6 of these types of gifts to give. they fulfill my desire to give something handmade and heartfelt, but the total outlay for these is about $90. it's okay to spend $90 for a total of 12 people right? somebody tell me this is okay. please?

What She Watches

Newest TV obsession: SciFi Channel's Ghost Hunters.

Reasons:
1. Steve
2. Steve
3. Steve
4. Steve
5. Spooky stuff

I don't think they necessarily disproved that the flash of light in the one room upstairs was not paranormal activity, but that's just me.

Vying for Attention

a part of me wants to join the rest of my profession who keep blawgs and write about the practice and my daily experiences with it, however, once i wait about two minutes and think about the endless spew of garbage that would probably spew forth, i re-gain my composure and don't think about it until the next time that a lull in billable hours has me trolling about. which these days happens on a frequent basis (not good).

i don't know why it is. sometimes i make visits to other people's blawgs and see a long, long list of links to other corners of the internet that prove to be well worth the visit once the link is clicked. i imagine all of the site traffic that could gradually come here if i just posted all of these tidbits about my life, started posting links, etc. but i know that if i started, posting, i would not know where to stop. and some of the things i know now about my practice i wish i would have never known, and they are things that need to be told if someone really wanted the "full story" as to where i am these days. but something is keeping me from spilling all of those details in a more "public" way. and i want to tell a good story, i really do. and the story about my work life that excludes these details is a boring story.

i admire people that do post anecdotes, stories, and musings about life as "we" (in the collective sense) know it (and how!). i'm far too much of a pansy to make that leap. so for now, i think i'm just going to post my meaningless, fluffy posts about the things that make me supremely happy, such as my previous post.

more confessional time

i am officially in e-love with running with lawyers. you should read it. that is all.

well, actually it's not. you know that phrase "you made your bed, now lie in it?" well, it's moronic to make a bed, and then lie in it, because you just made it. you would get the sheets wrinkly again and de-fluff the pillow, and that's no good at all. well, actually, The Governor sleeps on top of his covers on a made bed, but i've let it slide because he's ruler of this little corner of reality.

update

i am alive, but barely holding on to my sanity. we're contemplating a very big transition, and it will involve changes in every aspect of our lives. it's a nerve wracking time, but i think it's one that will make all of us in the equilibrium household better.

it's time consuming, however, and it has involved quite a lot of traveling in the past couple of weeks. and white lies that in the end will not have much consequence, but still i feel pangs of guilt every time i tell one.

will post more when more becomes evident.

99 Problems

courtesy of teahouse blossom, remixing Weezer and Jay-Z. "99 luft problems" is my favorite so far.

Random things I like:

Random things I like:

1. Plax
2. J&J's Bedtime Bath Lotion
3. Cute boys in geek glasses listening to iPods on the Metro
4. The writing on this blog.
5. Chunky carnelian beads
6. Junior Mints
7. Hot dentists

8. The way The Governor ends every sentence as if it's a question
9. What my husband looks like wearing glasses
10. Liquid Expresso extra fine line pens
11. Cheap faux jade Buddha statues
12. Tape flags that you can write on
13. Laughing in bed at midnight
14. Random strangers talking on the Metro to each other
15. Neatly-labeled binder folders
16. Pretty felt flowers
17. The fact that The Governor says "I love you"--or actually "I luff youuu," and then blows me a kiss.

self-fulfilling

when you lose your only pair of glasses, it's especially difficult.

It's hard to look for things when you can't really see that well.

Sick Days

getting sick might possibly be my body's response to working too hard. after a couple of difficult days last week, i continued to go into work and then this past weekend, i took care of my little guy all by myself of Saturday while my husband was out of town. i woke up yesterday and promptly emptied my cranial cavities of all that had accumulated there overnight.

it took a good 20 minutes.

and instead of sleeping, i'd decided to read Susan Monk Kidd's "The Secret Life of Bees," which had started off slow, but is going to be finished this afternoon.

i rarely take days off, including weekends. those two days that mark the end and the beginning of the week are always reserved for day trips to apple orchards or petting zoos, grocery shopping, working in the backyard. it's only lately that i've forced myself to quit being so ambitious with my plans for weekends, and only do the minimum needed to survive.

but today--today is my own. so what if i'm completely exhausted still, after having slept until 10:30 a.m.? so what if that guilt for not drafting a promised business plan keeps tapping me on the shoulder? i'm going to relax for a bit, take that second lavender-scented bath in 24 hours, and just breathe for a change.